I Have a Lump

There I said it; it’s out to the world.  I have a lump in my breast.  It has been there for a couple of months and I have put off having it checked for a number of reasons.  Yesterday I went and had it checked out…just a mass of cysts that will stay there.  No cancer just dense tissue with cysts.  I will take that.

The whole morning all I could think about was what if?  What if it’s cancer?  What will we do?  Will I be as strong and awesome as my friend Melissa was during her treatments?  How would Porter react to mommy not having hair?  How would I feel?  I was all over the place with my emotions.

Why am I sharing this personal scare in such a public manner?

  1. Not all lumps are cancer.  If you have a lump, please get it checked out.  Having a mammogram at 32 was not the highlight of my year, but very relieved.
  2. It’s scary to walk around not knowing what something is and going through all the tests.  It’s a secret you keep until you know what’s going on.  Calling my mom last night to fill her in was tough, but not terrible because she’s been there.
  3. Professionally and personally I’m a huge advocate of preventative screenings and knowing your numbers.  Do your monthly breast exams, have your pap smear and have your physical.  You know what’s scarier?  Finding out you have Stage 10 something that they can’t treat.  Take the time and do it.  *As noted above, yes, I put this off.

So what happens now?  One thing definitely has to change and it’s my coffee consumption.  These cysts can be painful with increased caffeine.  I LOVE coffee so this is really going to be a challenge.  No seriously this may be worse than when I was pregnant.  Huge coffee mugs are my thing.Otherwise I keep up my monthly breast exams and go from there.

coffe mug

The other is remembering the women and their families that were also sitting there yesterday.  Maybe some were just in for their annual mammograms, but some of them were not.

The staff at St. Vincent’s Breast Center were amazing yesterday.  They walked me through each step and kept me really well informed.  I got to see the images from my mammogram and the tech explained what we were looking at.  The ultrasound tech was the same way.  I need that when I’m undergoing tests, I want to know what you see and what I’m looking at.

Here are some breast lump myths and information.